The perils of ambulatory reading. If you have never said "Excuse me" to a parking meter or bashed your shins on a fireplug, you are probably wasting too much valuable reading time.

Sherri Chasin Calvo (contemp.) American science and medical writer


Does it really matter what these affectionate people do—so long as they don’t do it in the streets and frighten the horses!

Beatrice Campbell (1865-1940) English actress quoted in Dent, _Mrs. Patrick Campbell_ (1961)


History does not always repeat itself.   Sometimes it just yells "Can't you remember anything I told you?" and lets fly with a club.

John W. Campbell (1910-1971) American writer and editor


The myth is the public domain and the dream is the private myth. If your private myth, your dream, happens to coincide with that of the society, you are in good accord with your group. If it isn't, you've got a long adventure in the dark forest ahead of you.

Joseph Campbell (1904-1987) American mythological scholar


In the middle of winter I at last discovered that there was in me an invincible summer.

Albert Camus (1913-1960) French existentialist, playwright/novelist


If there is a sin against life, it consists perhaps not so much in despairing of life as in hoping for another life and in eluding the

implacable grandeur of this life.

Albert Camus (1913-1960) French existentialist, playwright/novelist


Most cats, when they are Out want to be In, and vice versa, and often simultaneously.
Dr Louis J. Camuti


You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone.

Alphonse Capone (1899-1957) American gangster


The nice thing about masturbation is that you don’t have to dress up for it.

Truman Capote


There are only three sins - causing pain, causing fear, and causing anguish. The rest is window dressing.

Roger Caras


A writer must simultaneously believe the following two things:

1. The story I am now working on is the greatest work of genius ever written in English.

2. The story I am now working on is worthless drivel

...Of course, believing two contradictory facts at the same time is sometimes referred to as madness, but that, too, can be an

asset to a writer.

Orson Scott Card


The event that caused the most suffering, the most loss of life, the most loss of culture, was Columbus’s discovery of America. It was the worst event in human history.
Orson Scott Card

Anyone who goes faster than me is an idiot. Anyone who goes slower than me is a moron. "Look at that idiot! Get outta my way, you moron! Look at that idiot!"

George Carlin (b. 1937) American comedian


The very existence of flame throwers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, ‘You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.’

George Carlin (b. 1937) American comedian


Headline: Police fire over rioters, kill dozens on second floor.

George Carlin (b. 1937) American comedian


Every day I beat my own previous record for the number of consecutive days I’ve stayed alive.

George Carlin (b. 1937) American comedian


May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.

George Carlin (b. 1937) American comedian


In ancient times there was a country whose harvest came in and it was poisonous. Those who ate of it became insane. “There is but one thing to do,” said the King. “We must eat the grain to survive, but there must be those among us who will remember that we are insane.”

Anon., from a George Carlin album cover


I’m not concerned about all hell breaking loose, but that a PART of hell will break loose... it’ll be much harder to detect.

George Carlin (b. 1937) American comedian


If you can't beat them, arrange to have them beaten.

George Carlin (b. 1937) American comedian Brain Droppings (1998)


[T]here seems to be with some people a feeling that you can tell a deeper truth by way of myths. I disagree with it in principle; I can not always disagree with it in practice.

I. Marc Carlson (contemp.) Belief-L (13 Jul. 2000)


How about "just be yourself, and the people who like you will like you for who you really are, and not who you are pretending to be"? You should be polite to the others because we need more politeness, but otherwise they can just go screw themselves with a shattered-glass-encrusted baseball bat.

I. Marc Carlson (contemp.) Belief-L


In some cases, all it requires is that you rationally point out that there is a problem. In others, all you can do is turn the other cheek. At the far end of the spectrum are those for whom the only appropriate response is to carve out their still-beating heart and force them to eat it.

I. Marc Carlson (contemp.) Belief-L


Remember, earthquakes are God's gentle little reminders that "Excuse me, I'm putting a mountain right where you are standing."

I. Marc Carlson (contemp.) Belief-L (16 Feb. 2001)


To put it bluntly, if we lived in a universe where all things were decided by God, and "free will" were nothing but a polite lie, then the universe would be nothing but masturbatory exercises of the Almighty, pre-scripted and acted out by the well-trained monkey people led about by "God's Will". I choose to not accept this possibility, since the universe would then have no purpose that could possibly interest me.

I. Marc Carlson (contemp.) Belief-L (8 Jan. 1999)


I do not believe in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance.

Thomas Carlyle (1795-1881) Scottish essayist and historian The Age of Reason, "The Author's Profession of Faith"


No man who has once heartily and wholly laughed can be altogether irreclaimably bad.

Thomas Carlyle (1795-1881) Scottish essayist and historian


Note to self: pasty-skinned programmers ought not stand out in the Mojave desert for multiple hours.

John Carmack


As I grow older, I pay less attention to what men say. I just watch what they do.

Andrew Carnegie (1835-1919) American industrialist and philanthropist


The most important thing in life is not simply to capitalize on your gains. Any fool can do that. The important thing is to profit from your losses. That requires intelligence, and makes the difference between a man of sense and a fool.

Dale Carnegie (1888-1955) American writer, lecturer


The ideas I stand for are not mine. I borrowed them from Socrates. I swiped them from Chesterfield. I stole them from Jesus. And I put them in a book. If you don’t like their rules, whose would you use?

Dale Carnegie (1888-1955) American writer, lecturer


I got what I have now through knowing the right time to tell terrible people to go to hell.

Leslie Caron (b. 1931) French dancer and actress


You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover's arms can only come later when you're sure they won't laugh if you trip.

Jonathan Carroll (b. 1949) American writer Outside the Dog Museum (1991)


   One day Alice came to a fork in the road and saw a Cheshire cat in a tree. "Which road do I take?" she asked.
   "Where do you want to go?" was his response.
   "I don't know," Alice answered.
   "Then," said the cat, "it doesn't matter."

Lewis Carroll (1832-1898) English writer and mathematician [pseud. of Rev. Charles Lutwidge Dodgson]
Alice's Adventures in Wonderland (1865)


“When I use a word,” Humpty replied in a scornful tone,” it means just what I choose it to mean--nothing more nor less.”

“The question is,” said Alice,” whether you can make a word mean so many different things.”

“The question is,” replied Humpty,” which is to be the master, that’s all.”

Lewis Carroll (1832-1898) English writer and mathematician [pseud. of Rev. Charles Lutwidge Dodgson]
Alice's Adventures in Wonderland (1865)


   "But I don't want to go among mad people," Alice remarked.
   "Oh, you can't help that," said the Cat. "We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad."
   "How do you know I'm mad?" said Alice.
   "You must be," said the Cat, "or you wouldn't have come here."

Lewis Carroll (1832-1898) English writer and mathematician [pseud. of Rev. Charles Lutwidge Dodgson]
Alice's Adventures Through the Looking-Glass (1871)


Happiness is your dentist telling you it won't hurt and then having him catch his hand on the drill.
"Johnny" William Carson


As an adolescent I aspired to lasting fame, I craved factual certainty, and I thirsted for a meaningful vision of human life -- so I became a scientist. This is like becoming an archbishop so you can meet girls.

Matt Cartmill (b. 1943) American biological anthropologist


If biologists don't want to see the theory of evolution evicted from the public schools because of its religious content, they need to accept the limitations of science and stop trying to draw vast, cosmic conclusions from the plain facts of evolution. Humility isn't just a cardinal virtue in Christian doctrine; it's also a virtue in the practice of science.

Matt Cartmill (b. 1943) American biological anthropologist

Duke Magazine, "Contemplating a Cosmic Convergence" (Jul. 2000)


Don't be vain because you happen to have talent. You are not responsible for that; it was not of your doing. What you do with your talent is what matters.

Pablo Casals (1876-1973) Spanish cellist, conductor, composer "Salute to Life" (1969)


Each second we live in a new and unique moment of the universe, a moment that never was before and will never be again. And what do we teach our children in school? We teach them that two and two make four, and that Paris is the capital of France. When will we also teach them what they are? You should say to each of them: Do you know what you are? You are unique. In all the world there is no other child exactly like you. In the millions of years that have passed there has never been a child like you. And look at your body--what a wonder it is! Your legs, your arms, your cunning fingers, the way you move! You may be a Shakespeare, a Michelangelo, a Beethoven. You have the capacity for anything. Yes, you are a marvel.

Pablo Casals (1876-1973) Spanish cellist, conductor, composer "You are a Marvel"


Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.

M. Kathleen Casey (contemp.) American sociologist [Kathleen Casey Theisen]


To kill a man is not to defend a doctrine, but to kill a man.

Sebastian Castellio (1515-1563) Savoyard teacher, translator [Sebastien Chatêillon]
Contra Libellum Calvini, on John Calvin's role in execution of Servetus (1554)


Modern man has left the realm of the unknown and the mysterious, and has settled down in the realm of the functional. He has turned his back to the world of the foreboding and the exulting and has welcomed the world of boredom.

Carlos Casteneda (b. 1931) American writer, mystic, anthropologist The Fire from Within (1984)


I may be kindly, I am ordinarily gentle, but in my line of business I am obliged to will terribly what I will at all.

Catherine II (1762-1796) Russian empress [Catherine the Great] Letter to Baron F. M. Grimm (1878)


Alas and alack, for the progress and pride of modern technology has turned the infinite majesty and mystery of the starry void to a cup of purplish grey, reflecting our own dingy, dusty glow back upon ourselves. In fact - and how had I not noticed before? - the yard itself was given such an un-Christmaslike “lustre of midday” (there was no moon, nor new-fallen snow) that I felt, had I wished, I could have seen clearly enough to unlock the combination on the shed door. I am certain that this enforced cloak of blindness is the major reason for the deplorable and irresponsible apathy or outright hostility of the average citizen toward the exploration and opening of the frontiers of space. I am convinced that if the people of Earth were given the chance to look - that when we convince ourselves that it is worth looking, and take back the birthright that we voluntarily surrendered - the birthright to look and dream - to see the Milky Way as anything but a dim cloud - then we’ll be more than halfway toward claiming the galaxy as our next frontier and surmounting it. And then I’ll be able to see the stars from the other side of the atmosphere.

Katy Catlin (contemp) American photographer?


Of course Humanity will survive to find what’s waiting out there. If we have to crawl out of the muck a second time to do it, we will. We’ll do it together as one people. And it doesn’t matter how long it takes to get there. Time, after all, is as much of human origin as boundary lines . . .

Katy Catlin (contemp) American photographer?


Carthage must be destroyed.

Cato the Elder, at the end of every speech


I have lived nearly fifty years, and I have seen life as it is. Pain, misery, hunger... cruelty beyond belief. I have heard the singing from taverns and the moans from bundles of filth on the streets. I have been a soldier and seen my comrades fall in battle... or die more slowly under the lash in Africa. I have held them in my arms at the final moment. These were men who saw life as it is, yet they died despairing. No glory, no gallant last words... only their eyes filled with confusion, whimpering the question: “Why?” I do not think they asked why they were dying, but why they had lived. When life itself seems lunatic, who knows where madness lies? Perhaps to be too practical is madness. To surrender dreams - this may be madness. To seek treasure where there is only trash. Too much sanity may be madness. And maddest of all, to see life as it is and not as it should be.

Miguel de Cervantes The Man of La Mancha (Don Quioxite)


We live in a rainbow of chaos.
Paul Cezanne


A market is the combined behavior of thousands of people responding to information, misinformation and whim.

Kenneth Chang (contemp.)


Tribulation will not hurt you, unless as it too often does; it hardens you and makes you sour, narrow and skeptical.
Edwin Hubbel Chapin


Someday after we have mastered the air, the winds, the tides and gravity, we will harness for God the energies of love. And then for the second time in the history of the world man will have discovered fire.

Pierre Teilhard de Chardin


They can't censor the gleam in my eye.

Laughton Charles (1899-1962) British actor


When he said we were trying to make a fool of him, I could only murmur that the Creator had beat us to it.

Ilka Chase (1905-1978) American actress, writer quoted in Cooper & Hartman, "Mrs. Crankhurst" (1980)


The theater is a baffling business, and a shockingly wasteful one when you consider that people who have proven their worth, who have appeared in or been responsible for successful plays, who have given outstanding performances, can still, in the full tide of their energy, be forced, through lack of opportunity, to sit idle season after season, their enthusiasm, their morale, their very talent dwindling to slow gray death. Of finances we will not even speak; it is too sad a tale.

Ilka Chase (1905-1978) American actress, writer Past Imperfect (1942)


Any idiot can face a crisis, it is the day-to-day living that wears you out.

Anton Pavlovich Chekhov (1860-1904) Russian playwright and writer


Nothing better forges a bond of love, friendship or respect than common hatred toward something.

Anton Pavlovich Chekhov (1860-1904) Russian playwright and writer Notebooks, Notebook I, vol. 17, p. 52, “Nauka” (1921)


The soul would have no rainbow had the eyes no tears.

John Vance Cheney


Be wiser than other people, if you can; but do not tell them so.

Lord Chesterfield (1694-1773) English statesman, wit [Philip Dormer Stanhope] Letter to his son (29 Nov. 1745)


Wear your learning, like your watch, in a private pocket; and do not pull it out and strike it, merely to show that you have one. If you are asked what o'clock it is, tell it; but do not proclaim it hourly and unasked, like the watchman.

Lord Chesterfield (1694-1773) English statesman, wit [Philip Dormer Stanhope] Letter to his son (22 Feb. 1748)


It's not the world that's gotten so much worse, but the news coverage that's gotten so much better.

Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874-1936) English journalist and writer


Never invoke the gods unless you really want them to appear. It annoys them very much.

Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874-1936) English journalist and writer


I believe what really happens in history is this: the old man is always wrong; and the young people are always wrong about what is wrong with him. The practical form it takes is this: that, while the old man may stand by some stupid custom, the young man always attacks it with some theory that turns out to be equally stupid.

Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874-1936) English journalist and writer


Fairy tales do not tell children the dragons exist. Children already know that dragons exist. Fairy tales tell children the dragons can be killed.

Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874-1936) English journalist and writer


To have a right to do a thing is not at all the same as to be right in doing it.

Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874-1936) English journalist and writer A Short History of England (1917)


Religious liberty might be supposed to mean that everybody is free to discuss religion. In practice it means that hardly anybody is allowed to mention it.

Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874-1936) English journalist and writer Autobiography (1936)


Men feel that cruelty to the poor is a kind of cruelty to animals. They never feel that it is an injustice to equals; nay it is treachery to comrades.

Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874-1936) English journalist and writer Charles Dickens, Ch. 11 (1906)


The wise old fairy tales never were so silly as to say that the prince and the princess lived peacefully ever afterwards. The fairy tales said that the prince and the princess lived happily, and so they did. They lived happily, although it is very likely that from time to time they threw the furniture at each other. Most marriages, I think, are happy marriages; but there is no such thing as a contented marriage. The whole pleasure of marriage is that it is a perpetual crisis.

Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874-1936) English journalist and writer Chesterton on Dickens (1911)


The dispute that goes on between Macbeth and his wife about the murder of Duncan is almost word for word a dispute which goes on at any suburban breakfast table about something else. It is merely a matter of changing 'Infirm of purpose, give me the daggers' into 'Infirm of purpose, give me the postage stamps.'

Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874-1936) English journalist and writer Chesterton on Shakespeare, ed. Dorothy Collins (1972)


Tradition means giving votes to the most obscure of all classes—our ancestors. It is the democracy of the dead. Tradition refuses to submit to the small and arrogant oligarchy of those who merely happen to be walking around.

Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874-1936) English journalist and writer Orthodoxy, Ch. 4, "The Ethics of England" (1908)


"My Country, right or wrong" is a thing no patriot would think of saying except in a desperate case. It is like saying, "My mother, drunk or sober."

Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874-1936) English journalist and writer The Defendant, “Defence of Patriotism” (1901)


The one really rousing thing about human history is that, whether or no the proceedings go right, at any rate, the prophecies always go wrong. The promises are never fulfilled and the threats are never fulfilled. Even when good things do happen, they are never the good things that were guaranteed. And even when bad things happen, they are never the bad things that were inevitable. You may be quite certain that, if an old pessimist says the country is going to the dogs, it will go to any other animals except the dogs; if it be to the dromedaries or even the dragons. ... It was as if one weather prophet confidently predicted blazing sunshine and the other was equally certain of blinding fog; and they were both buried in a beautiful snow-storm and lay, fortunately dead, under a clear and starry sky.

Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874-1936) English journalist and writer The Illustrated London News, column (17 April 1926)


Christianity has not been tried and found wanting; it has been found difficult and left untried.

Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874-1936) English journalist and writer What's Wrong with the World (1910)


The day we lose our need for dreams is the day the human race forfeits its soul.

John Chiam


Anger is a very appropriate and necessary response to an injustice.
Bill Chickering


If a general is ignorant of the principles of adaptabiliy, he must not be entrusted with a position of authority. The skilful employer of men will employ the wise man, the brave man, the covetous man and the stupid man. For the wise man delights in establishing his merit, the brave man likes to show his courage in action, the covetous man is quick at seizing advantages, and the stupid man has no fear of death.
So Mo Ch’ien, The Art of War

I … go to MacDonald's and Burger King on occasion. What else are you going to do when you're on the road and you have to dash in for some food? They are pretty good; they're clean, and you know what you're getting. I don't know why anyone would think I always dine on hummingbird tongues or something.

Julia Child (b. 1912) American chef and writer


Terrorism is not the weapon of the weak. It is the weapon of those who are against “us” whoever “us” happens to be.

Noam Chomsky


I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.

Dame Agatha Christie (1890-1976) English writer


I don't think necessity is the mother of invention - invention, in my opinion, arises directly from idleness, possibly also from laziness. To save oneself trouble.
Dame Agatha Christie (1890-1976) English writer


It is a curious thought, but it is only when you see people looking ridiculous that you realize just how much you love them.

Dame Agatha Christie (1890-1976) English writer


Every murderer is probably somebody's old friend.

Dame Agatha Christie (1890-1976) English writer The Mysterious Affair at Styles, Ch. 11 (Poirot) (1911)


Men stumble over the truth from time to time, but most pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing happened.

Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965) British statesman and author


Remember the story of the Spanish prisoner. For many years he was confined in a dungeon... One day it occurred to him to push the door of his cell. It was open; and it had never been locked.

Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965) British statesman and author


If you will not fight when your victory will be sure and not too costly, you may come to the moment when you will have to fight with all the odds against you and only a precarious chance for survival. There may even be a worse case. You may have to fight when there is no hope of victory, because it is better to perish than to live as slaves.

Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965) British statesman and author


There is nothing more exhilarating than to be shot at without result.

Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965) British statesman and author


You ask, What is our policy? I will say; “It is to wage war, by sea, land and air, with all our might and with all the strength that God can give us: to wage war against a monstrous tyranny, never surpassed in the dark lamentable catalogue of human crime. That is our policy.” You ask, What is our aim? I can answer with one word: Victory—victory at all costs, victory in spite of all terror, victory however long and hard the road may be; for without victory there is no survival.

Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965) British statesman and author


If you’re going through hell, keep going.

Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965) British statesman and author


From now on, ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which I shall not put.

Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965) British statesman and author


Even though large tracts of Europe and many old and famous States have fallen or may fall into the grip of the Gestapo and all the odious apparatus of Nazi rule, we shall not flag or fail. We shall go on to the end. We shall fight in France, we shall fight on the seas and oceans, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our island, whatever the cost may be. We shall fight on the beaches, we shall fight on the landing grounds, we shall fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall fight in the hills; we shall never surrender, and even if, which I do not for a moment believe, this island or a large part of it were subjugated and starving, then our Empire beyond the seas, armed and guarded by the British Fleet, would carry on the struggle, until, in God's good time, the new world, with all its power and might, steps forth to the rescue and the liberation of the old.

Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965) British statesman and author Hansard, 4 June 1940, col. 796



What General Weygand called the “Battle of France” is over. I expect that the Battle of Britain is about to begin. Upon this battle depends the survival of Christian civilization. Upon it depends our own British life and the long continuity of our institutions and our Empire. The whole fury and might of the enemy must very soon be turned on us. Hitler knows that he will have to break us in this island or lose the war. If we can stand up to him all Europe may be free and the life of the world may move forward into broad, sunlit uplands; but if we fail then the whole world, including the United States, and all that we have known and cared for, will sink into the abyss of a new dark age made more sinister, and perhaps more prolonged, by the lights of a perverted science. Let us therefore brace ourselves to our duty, and so bear ourselves that, if the British Commonwealth and its Empire lasts for a thousand years, men will still say, “This was their finest hour.”

Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965) British statesman and author Hansard 18 June 1940, col. 60


You can always trust the Americans. in the end they will do the right thing, after they have eliminated all the other possibilities.

Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965) British statesman and author


   WOMAN: There are two things I don't like about you, Mr. Churchill -- your politics and your mustache.
   CHURCHILL: My dear madam, pray do not disturb yourself. You are not likely to come into contact with either.

Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965) British statesman and author Exchange with anonymous woman


Never injure a friend, even in jest.



The national budget must be balanced. The public debt must be reduced; the arrogance of the authorities must be moderated and controlled. Payments to foreign governments must be reduced, if the nation doesn't want to go bankrupt. People must again learn to work, instead of living on public assistance.

Marcus Tullius Cicero (106-43 BC) Roman orator, statesman, philosopher (63 BC or 55 BC?)


The most important thing that parents can teach their children is how to get along without them.

Frank A. Clark


You’ve got to sing like you don’t need the money, love like you’ll never get hurt. You’ve got to dance like no one is watching. It’s gotta come from the heart, if you want it to work.

Susannah Clark


The best measure of a man's honesty isn't his income tax return.   It's the zero adjust on his bathroom scale.

Arthur C. Clarke (b. 1917) British writer


CNN is one of the participants in the war. I have a fantasy where Ted Turner is elected president but refuses because he doesn’t want to give up power.

Arthur C. Clarke (b. 1917) British writer


The future isn’t what it used to be.

Arthur C. Clarke (b. 1917) British writer


But the only way of discovering the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible.

Arthur C. Clarke (b. 1917) British writer
Profiles of the Future, "Hazards of Prophecy: The Failure of Imagination" (Clarke's Second Law) (1962; rev. 1973)


In the early days all I hoped was to make a living out of what I did best. But, since there’s no real market for masturbation I had to fall back on my bass playing abilities.

Les Claypool, Primus


The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them.

William Clayton (contemp.)


The great mistake most people make is the assumption that most people are sane. I know very few people who are sane -- and only one man in my life who was really grown up. All the other people are terribly recognizable as kids who have learned grown-up ways of behaving.

John Cleese (b. 1939) British comedian


America is the only nation in history which miraculously has gone directly from barbarism to degeneration without the usual interval of civilisation.

Georges Clemenceau


If a man, holding a belief which he was taught in childhood or persuaded of afterwards, keeps down and pushes away any doubts which arise about it in his mind, purposely avoids the reading of books and the company of men that call into question or discuss it, and regards as impious those questions which cannot easily be asked without disturbing it — the life of that man is one long sin against mankind.

William Kingdom Clifford (1845-1879) English mathematician and philosopher The Ethics of Belief (1877)


The last time I checked, the Constitution said, "of the people, by the people and for the people." That's what the Declaration of Independence says.

William Jefferson Clinton (b. 1946) US President, 1993-2001

Speech, inadvertently quoting the Gettysburg Address (17 Oct. 1996)


If you can’t beat them, arrange to have them beaten.
George Clooney


A huge part of real love is constant forgiveness.

Glenn Close


If the former Soviet Union had churned out a few more games such as Tetris and fewer nuclear warheads, they might have won the Cold War. We capitalists would have been too engrossed in our Tetris games to have noticed their tanks rolling across the Iron Curtain - that's how addictive Alexey Pajitnov's seemingly simple puzzle game was. Of course, Soviet Communism collapsed under its own weight, and it's interesting to note that Pajitnov is now working at Microsoft. Coincidence? We think not.

CNET Gamecenter, "The Top 40 Games of the Millennium"


We must believe in luck. For how else can we explain the success of those we don’t like?

Jean Cocteau (1889-1963) French writer, filmmaker, artist On his election to the Académie Française (1955)


I love cats because I love my home and after a while they become its visible soul.
Jean Cocteau (1889-1963) French writer, filmmaker, artist


It is not Scripture that creates hostility to homosexuality, but rather hostility to homosexuality that prompts certain Christians to retain a few passages from an otherwise discarded law code. The problem is not how to reconcile homosexuality with scriptural passages, but rather how to reconcile the rejection and punishment of homosexuals with the love of Christ.

Rev. William Sloane Coffin, Jr. (b. 1924) American Protestant social activist The Courage to Love (1982)


Why isn’t my hair combed? Because combing my hair would contribute to the entropy death of the universe. Won’t not combing my hair contributeto the entropy death of the universe? Yes, but not combing my hair I’ll have more time for other things.

Evan Cohen


The word apocalyptic has interesting origins. It comes from the Greek apokalupsis, which mean revelation. This derives from the Greek apokaluptein, meaning uncover or disclose. Apo is a Greek prefix meaning from, derived from. Kaluptein means to cover. This is cognate with Kalube, which is cabin, and Kalumma which means woman’s veil. Thus apocalyptic describes what happens when a woman’s veil is lifted.
Leonard Cohen, “Beautiful Losers”

The ark was built by amateurs, and the Titanic by the experts. Don’t wait for the experts.

Murray Cohen


The two most evangelical groups in the world are atheists and vegetarians, especially the least knowledgeable and least intelligent individuals within those groups.

Clark Coleman


If a country is worth living in, it is worth fighting for.

Manning Coles


As for an authentic villain, the real thing, the absolute, the artist, one rarely meets him even once in a lifetime. The ordinary bad hat is always in part a decent fellow.

Sidonie-Gabrielle Colette (1873-1954) French writer Break of Day (1961)


You tell me it is too early to be looking back,
but that is because you have forgotten
the perfect simplicity of being one
and the beautiful complexity introduced by two.
Billy Collins, The Art of Drowning (1995). On Turning Ten


To know a man, observe how he wins his object, rather than how he loses it; for when we fail, our pride supports us; when we succeed, it betrays us.

Charles Caleb Colton (1780-1832) English clergyman, writer


Times of great calamity and confusion have ever been productive of the greatest minds. The purest ore is produced from the hottest furnace, and the brightest thunderbolt is elicited from the darkest storm.
Charles Caleb Colton (1780-1832) English clergyman, writer


It is only when the rich are sick that they fully feel the impotence of wealth.

Charles Caleb Colton (1780-1832) English clergyman, writer Lacon (1820)


Men will wrangle for religion; write for it; fight for it; die for it; anything but live for it.

Charles Caleb Colton (1780-1832) English clergyman, writer Lacon, vol. 1, #25 (1820)


Examinations are formidable even to the best prepared, for the greatest fool may ask more than the wisest man can answer.

Charles Caleb Colton (1780-1832) English clergyman, writer Lacon, vol. 1, #322 (1820)


Censorship always defeats it own purpose, for it creates in the end the kind of society that is incapable of exercising real discretion.
Henry Steele Commager


Despite some of the horrors and barbarisms of modern life which appall and grieve us, life has - or has the potential of - such richness, joy and adventure as were unknown to our ancestors except in their dreams.

Arthur H. Compton


By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest.

Confucius (551-479 BC) Chinese philosopher [Ku'ng Ch'in, Ku'ng Fu-tzu]


What is called a great minister is one who serves his prince according to what is right; and when he finds he cannot do so, retires.

Confucius (551-479 BC) Chinese philosopher [Ku'ng Ch'in, Ku'ng Fu-tzu] Lun Yu, 11.23


To see what is right and not to do it is want of courage.

Confucius (551-479 BC) Chinese philosopher [Ku'ng Ch'in, Ku'ng Fu-tzu] Lun Yu, II, xxv


Heav’n hath no rage like love to hatred turn’d, Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorn’d.

William Congreve (1670-1729) English playwright and poet


There's no need to be.

James S. Conner (1918 -1988) Last words. He was dying, and his wife had just said that she was afraid of what was about to happen.


Every age is fed on illusions, lest men should renounce life early and the human race come to an end.

Joseph Conrad (1857-1924) Polish-English novelist [b. Teodor Josef Konrad Korzeniowski]

Victory: An Island Tale, ch. 3 (1915)


The appearance of sincerity counts for more than actual truthfulness.
Glen Cook, The Garrett Files

The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness and kindness, can be trained to do most things.

Jilly Cooper


You become a champion by fighting one more round. When things are tough, you fight one more round.

James Corbett (1866-1933) Irish-American boxer [a.k.a. Gentleman Jim]


The childless experts on child raising also bring tears of laughter to my eyes when they say, “I love children because they’re so honest.” There is not an agent in the CIA or the KGB who knows how to conceal the theft of food, how to fake being asleep, or how to forge a parent’s signature like a child.

Bill Cosby (b. 1937) American comedian Fatherhood, ch. 5 (1986)


Immortality is a long shot, I admit. But somebody has to be first.
Bill Cosby (b. 1937) American comedian


In dealing with kids, no matter how little we understand their explanations, we must always remember that we're the adults. What this means I have no idea. It certainly means nothing to the kids, who instinctively seem to know that adults are merely strange people who have dopey ideas like "Stop throwing peas at your sister."
Bill Cosby (b. 1937) American comedian Fatherhood (1986)


Men will wrangle for religion, write for it, fight for it, die for it, anything but live for it.

Charles Cotton


There is a tendency to mistake data for wisdom, just as there has always been a tendency to confuse logic with values, intelligence with insight. Unobstructed access to facts can produce unlimited good only if it is matched by the desire and ability to find out what they mean and where they lead. Facts are terrible things if left sprawling and unattended. They are too easily regarded as evaluated certainties rather than as the rawest of raw materials crying to be processed into the texture of logic. It requires a very unusual mind, Whitehead said, to undertake the analysis of a fact. The computer can provide a correct number, but it may be an irrelevant number until judgment is pronounced.

Norman Cousins (1915-1990) American editor Human Options: An Autobiographical Notebook, "Freedom as Teacher" (1981)


History is a vast early warning system.
Norman Cousins (1915-1990) American editor


You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment if you don't trust enough.

Frank Crane (1861-1929) American clergyman, journalist [(or F. H. Crane, b.1912, or F. Crane 1873-1948)]


There was pride in his eyes without arrogance. Behind the pride was a sadness so deep it seemed to stretch back to ancient mysteries Mark could not even imagine, and he felt a small thrill of fear, or anticipation, which a man knows if he’s lucky enough to meet and recognise his challenge.

Margaret Craven I Heard an Owl Call my Name

He did not know that when he turned back in his own eyes was the depth of sadness which he had begun to understand.
Margaret Craven I Heard an Owl Call my Name

HAMMOND: When they opened Disneyland in 1956 nothing worked.
MALCOLM: Yeah, but, John, if the 'Pirates of the Caribbean' breaks down, the pirates don't eat the tourists.

Michael Crichton (b. 1942) American writer Jurassic Park (movie) (1993)


If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside.

Robert X. Cringely (contemp.) American computer columnist [pseudonym] InfoWorld


A gentleman doesn't pounce ... he glides.

Quentin Crisp (1908-1999) English writer and gay activist Manners from Heaven, ch. 6 (1984)


The young always have the same problem - how to rebel and conform at the same time. They have now solved this by defying their parents and copying each other.

Quentin Crisp (1908-1999) English writer and gay activist


Put any ten people in a room, they may not elect a leader, but I guarantee they’ll pick someone to hate.

Larson Crockett


No one would be foolish enough to choose war over peace - in peace sons bury their fathers, but in war fathers bury their sons.

Croesus of Lydia


I love you, not for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you.

Roy Croft


I'd move to Los Angeles if Australia and New Zealand were swallowed upby a huge tidal wave, if there was a bubonic plague in Europe, and ifthe continent of Africa disappeared from some Martian attack.

Russell Crowe Australian actor


Continuously, unnoticeably, at the rate of one second per second, the world turned from what it had been and into what it was to be.
John Crowley Aegypt


to be nobody-but-myself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make me everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight, and never stop fighting.

e.e. cummings


it takes courage to grow up and turn out to be who you really are.
e.e. cummings


maggie and millie and molly and may
went down to the beach (to play one day)
and maggie discoverd a shell that sang so sweetly
she couldn't remember her troubles
millie befriended a stranded star whose rays five languid fingers were
and molly was chased by a horrible thing which raced sideways while blowing bubbles;
may came home with a smooth round stone as small as a world and as large as alone.
for whatever we lose (like a you or a me)
it's always ourselves we find in the sea.



   BLACKADDER: I, on the other hand, have a degree from the University of Life, a diploma from the School of Hard Knocks, and three gold stars from the Kindergarten of Getting the Shit Kicked Out of Me.

Richard Curtis (b. 1956) English screenwriter Blackadder Goes Forth, "Captain Cook" (with Ben Elton) (1984)


He accidentally, very brutally, sadly, cut his head off while combing his hair.

Richard Curtis (b. 1956) English screenwriter One of the Blackadder shows


   EBENEZER BLACKADDER: HA! Got him with my subtle plan!
   BALDRICK: I can't see any subtle plan!
   EBENEZER BLACKADDER: Baldrick, you wouldn't see a subtle plan if it painted itself purple and danced naked on top of a harpsichord, singing "Subtle plans are here again!"

Richard Curtis (b. 1956) English screenwriter Blackadder's Christmas Carol (with Ben Elton) (1988)